Chapter father-to-son: Father to Son | Summary

Elizabeth Jennings’ poem 'Father to Son' is a deeply emotional and universal exploration of the generation gap and the breakdown of communication within a family. The poem is written from the perspective of a father who is struggling to understand his grown-up son, despite having lived under the same roof for many years. The father’s grief is evident from the very first lines; he admits that he knows nothing of his child. This lack of connection is painful for him because he remembers the boy as a small child and wishes he could rebuild their relationship from that starting point. However, he feels that the 'seed' he sowed—the values and upbringing he provided—has fallen on land that is no longer his. This metaphor suggests that the son has grown into an independent individual with his own thoughts, interests, and world, which the father cannot enter or share. The physical proximity of living in the same house only highlights the emotional distance between them. They speak like strangers, and there is a palpable lack of understanding in the air. The father describes the son as being 'built to my design,' meaning he sees his own physical or character traits in the boy, yet he is frustrated because he cannot share in what the son loves. The poem also touches upon the father’s desire for the son to be 'prodigal.' This is a reference to the Biblical story of the Prodigal Son, implying that the father would rather have his son return home after making mistakes than see him succeed in a world that is entirely separate from the father's life. He is ready to forgive and shape a new love from the sorrow they both feel. In the final stanza, the poem shifts to include the son’s perspective, revealing that the son also feels a sense of grief and confusion. He explains that his anger often grows out of his own sadness because he cannot understand himself. Both father and son are trapped in a cycle of silence and longing. They both 'put out an empty hand,' symbolizing a desire for reconciliation and a need for something to forgive, yet neither knows how to take the first step. The poem ends on a poignant note of mutual helplessness, showing that while both parties want to bridge the gap, the wall of silence remains difficult to break. It serves as a reminder of how lack of communication can turn close relatives into strangers.